What if parents choose another boy rejecting my devotee choice?
A girl devotee who requested anonymity asked like this:
“Hare Krishna prabhu ji, pls its my humble request thant dnt disclose my name. thank u n your answers are too practical and nice so i also want a answer of 1 question.
My question is that i want to marry a boy because he is also a devotee and 2nd is also of my society but the problm is that my family is searching a guy for me and in my family no one trying 4 devotion. That boy can’t tell to his parent at present because he hav some career related an some faimly problm frm 2 month i am too tensed for this… Pls suggest me prabhu what should i do? Thank u. hare krishna”
Unless you throw the stone, you can’t get fruit. You have not yet informed your liking to your parents. Then, how can you get a solution?
Shiv Kera beautifully said:
“If you want something, you should ASK. If you don’t get, ASK AGAIN”
(Is marriage between initiated and uninitiated devotees advisable? READ HERE!)
In the Bible (Mathews 7:7), it is said:
“Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and Search shall find; Knock, and it shall be opened unto you”
So, Unless you open the matter to your and his parents in a proper manner, you can not move even a bit further and you can never come to a conclusion.
First, ensure that he is a honest devotee who is not making show and truly likes to grow in devotional life.
You too evaluate your preferences in life. Whether you like to follow the serious devotion by altering your material preferences, or, you like to give equal preferences for both material and spiritual lives.
Then, consider whether that boy will match your preferences. Then decide to inform your parents about that boy.
You must convey your choice to your parents and his parents politely explaining the credits you and he have. Explain why you will be happy if you marry a devotee.
(Will selecting a devotee for marriage seeing appearance work correctly? READ HERE!)
That boy should also have an initiative to meet your parents and explain. So, do this by choosing a right time in which your and his parents are in good mood.
If that boy is jobless, first ask him to go for a good job. I always advise the youth to start earning well before marriage. Love comes even in your teen age. But, the youth should not marry without any earning by the boy. Because, without money, you can not run even a single day of life.
If that boy meets your parents without any job, they may not agree. So, first let him settle in a good job. Then, there are chances for success in your discussion.
Every parent will like to give their daughter to a boy who has good earning as they should not face strain in relations in future.
So, meet your parents after he gets a good job. Request your parents to postpone your marriage arrangements for one year that may temporarily stop the parents choose another boy. Also tell that boy to settle in a good job within a year.
Both of you may get the help of an influential relative and request him/ her to discuss with your parents on your behalf.
(If inter caste marriage gives hell to parents, why many devotees do that? READ HERE!)
If the boy explains that he will take care of the family life with you in a responsible manner, your parents may agree for the marriage with your choice of a devotee boy, as there is no barrier of caste.
A talented sales man can market even an ordinary stone, if he is able to explain well. Similarly, if that boy explains about himself well, he can market himself in front of your parents.
Try. Also pray to Krishna to give you a devotee husband like that boy.
Assure Krishna that you will dedicate your life after marriage for His service. If you pray like this selflessly, Krishna will hear your prayers.
Hope you are clear what to do if the parents choose another boy rejecting your choice of a devotee boy.
(Finding Match for marriage Satisfying both Parents and Krishna! Tips! READ HERE!)