If intercaste marriage gives hell to parents, why many devotees do that?
A male devotee (Name hidden) asked like this:
“i have a question I have heard somewhere that if intercaste marriage should not be done such as a bhramana should nt marry lower caste if it is done then a varnsankar is born who destroy pitar system and takes all to hail as pittar are not able to get pind dan
But in iskcon marriage with different caste devotes are preferred. Do this have a positive or negative consequence. If two devotees marry of different caste then child born to them is a varnsankar ? As said by u that its better to marryva devotee than a non devotee . Anna plz reply and plz hide my name. Hare krishna”
It is not true in all cases that intercaste marriage gives hell to parents. Let us see that in this Post.
Actually, Varna and Ashrama systems are very important for the proper maintenance of the order of this human society.
But, they are applicable just during the Sadhaka, ie, practicing stages of our devotion.
They can also be considered as social structures that are the base from which one can follow suitable devotional/ Self realizing/ God realizing processes.
(Inter Caste marriages for the devotees and non devotees! A Research! READ HERE!)
However, when we go back to Krishna, we have no varna. Or, when we get Krishna in this body itself, we come out of these varnas or ashramas.
In other words, Once we become materially detached, we have no varnas or ashramas.
Next, once we get the Krishna Prema, we become dedicated Vaishnavas. They have no business in this material world for their own benefit. These vaishnavas cross all the varna/ ashrama systems and get situated in the devotion of Krishna.
When we enter into Vaikunta/ Goloka, Krishna does not see us as a Sudra or kshatriya or vaishya or Brahmana
He is convinced with our devotional status and hence has called us to His kingdom. Finished.
(Finding Match for marriage Satisfying both Parents and Krishna! Tips! READ HERE!)
So, Varna and Ashrama are like the schools to facilitate us follow devotion from a regulated but comfortable platform. When we get a job, we do not take our school with us. We learnt syllabus in schools and desert the schools and go to a job. Just the learnt knowledge remains with us all the time.
As said by you, if you lead a materialistic life, every child should add Punya (Good credits) to his deceased parents and ancestors by performing rituals like Shrartha, ie, annual rituals. When our ancestors die, they are situated in the world of ancestors till they get the next body. When the son performs all the vedic rituals, they get relieved from there and get next birth soon. Hence these rituals. If we do not perform these rituals, they will get more hell terms and their next birth will get delayed.
When we do such rituals, the brahmanas get some resources to live. This adds Punya for the ancestors. So, they get faster relief from their existing hellish status or life in the world of ancestors.
Another rule is that of a son marries a girl of another community, that son loses his right to perform vedic rituals to his deceased parents and grand parents. So, the parents can not get new birth earlier and suffer long period in the hells and then in the Pitru loka (world of ancestors).
All these rules apply only for those who lead a material life for their pleasure and the pleasure of kiths and kins.
(Can the devotees of different castes marry if they follow all devotional rules? READ HERE!)
But, if a son becomes a SERIOUS DEVOTEE of Krishna and desert material attachments and get attached to Krishna, that means, he has got Krishna in this body itself. Hence, he is a liberated person in this body itself.
Since he is liberated and Krishna Conscious, his ancestors will also get liberation and become purified. Therefore, a sincere Krishna Conscious person does good for his ancestors. Since his ancestors would have got liberated from Pitru Lokas, the sons need not perform any rituals for ancestors. All the vedic rituals go to Pitru loka only. Their ancestors will be eligible for moksha. So, sending things to Pitru loka is unnecessary.
That is why, the SERIOUS DEVOTEES of Krishna who have SUCCESSFULLY DETACHED FROM MATERIAL AFFAIRS and ATTAHED TO KRISHNA need not perform any rituals for ancestors.
(12 TIPS TO FIND A MATCHING DEVOTEE BOY OR GIRL FOR MARRIAGE! READ HERE!)
But, we should not consider ourselves as serious devotees and stop the rituals. Until we have even a trace of material attachments, ie, some expectations for our well being, we are still little material though we are growing in devotion. Until that we should perform such rituals.
Once you are convinced that you have situated well in devotion that reflects in your material detachment level, you may stop those rituals. Such sincere devotees have no varna or ashrama and hence they can not be classified under any classification. They have become dedicated vaishnavas who live only for Krishna. Such level of two vaishnavas can marry irrespective of their caste by birth.
So, become a sincere and dedicated vaishnava and you have no vedic barrier to marry any girl.
Hope all of you are clear about whether intercaste marriage gives hell to parents.
(Why the scriptures say that the inter caste marriage affect the ancestors? READ HERE!)