No Mating or Mating to get devotee children – Which is good for devotee couples?
A Girl Devotee (Name hidden by me) messaged like this:
“Hare Krishna Prabhuji. In one of the post you wrote that even when partners engage in sexual contact for producing children they experience pleasure. Although it is approved by Krishna it is also lust isn’t it? So isn’t sexless Krishna Conscious marriages better? The husband and wife can adopt children. Our body is Krishna’s body as well. Should we contaminate that by material sexual union?”
Why you people feel allergy about sex after marriage?
If it is wrong, why did Krishna give such feelings and organs?
Is Krishna a fool to give some tools and advice not to use that tool?
Only illicit acts and violations are to be avoided. Not the genuine activity itself. If you ask for a choice between “No Mating or Mating to get devotee children”, the clear advice will be to choose the second one.
(Many devotees are unmarried. But, Non devotees Get married earlier. Why? READ HERE!)
Will you hate the act of eating but to have tongue?
Will you avoid kirtans but have ears?
Will you sit within the closed room till you die just because you will have to see materialistic people outside?
Why some devotees are this much childish to hate the actions with the senses?
Your question makes me tensed because I am seriously worried seeing some devotees considering the activities through senses wrong.
See, others use these organs for their own benefits.
But, we use the same organs for serving Krishna.
You can use even mating for serving Krishna.
Of course mating gives some pleasures for the two persons. Without enjoying that pleasure, one can’t get his/ her organs prepared to involve in that action.
(Is marriage and getting more children advised or not? READ HERE!)
I have explained this in THIS Post of our site.
Of course, we will have some enjoyments in that activity. It is unavoidable because the organ has to prepare itself for mating.
So, contamination of enjoyment feeling is unavoidable even in the case of devotee couples.
So, such contamination is permitted because the result of the contamination is going to be a devotee child for serving Krishna.
If we work for Krishna, such mistakes and contamination are permitted.
Even when you eat, thousands of microorganisms die. Will you stop eating.
(How to follow Sanyasa in Grahastha Ashram? READ HERE!)
When you travel on road, you see a cinema poster with ugly scenes. Will you cut your eyes and throw?
When you read our posts, some ads may be there. Will you avoid the posts to avoid seeing those ads? Then, how can a media function without earnings?
So, nothing wrong to enjoy the company of spouse to get a child and make him/ her a devotee. That enjoyment will be forgiven, because your purpose is to serve Krishna.
So, if you are interested, marry a boy, have ……….. and get a child or two. If you totally hate marriage, avoid that and avoid illicit acts.
Why should you bear the karma of another parent by adopting a child? Though it may be a help for that child, even that parental relationship with the adopted child may give strong bondage in future. Instead, you can have ………..and get your own child if gifted by Krishna. You can do …………even 100 times till you get a child and make him/ her a devotee as said by Srila Prabhupada.
The purpose is to give a new devotee to Krishna. That is the god purpose.
I support adopting a child only if a couple does not get a child even after a few years of marriage and declared that getting a child is impossible.
(PROS AND CONS OF BRAHMACHARYA AND GRAHASTHA (MARRIED) LIVES! READ HERE!)
Those who can produce a child can do that and cultivate them as devotees.
If they marry and totally avoid ………… with spouse, almost three fourth of spouse will not stay in that ashrama in kaliyuga.
So, such pleasure feelings are permitted if our aim is to get a child to serve Krishna.
How do I see the beautiful girls and boys? Do I neglect the girls?
Not at all. I love all girls and boys because they are the creations of Krishna.
When I see beautiful girls or boys, I usually think how artistic and clever Krishna is to create such beautiful girls and boys! I see even girls as the beautiful creations of Krishna. Such thoughts are good. You will wonder seeing the beauty of girls, but, with a mindset of seeing them as beautiful creations of Krishna, not as sense objects.
Similarly, the couples can wonder the beauty of each other as the beautiful creations of Krishna. With this kind of mindset, even a bare body of spouse will be seen by you as the beautiful creation of Krishna.
(12 RULES ABOUT HOW A GRAHASTHA SHOULD LEAD HIS LIFE! READ HERE!)
In such admiring thoughts, you will not violate. You will just see Krishna even in the love and attraction of the spouse.
So, Only if you like to marry, then marry a girl interested in devotional way of life, see the spouse as the beautiful creation of Krishna. Have ………………….to get children. Make the children as the devotees of Krishna.
Your life will become a meaningful service to the Lord.
Do not think and speak anything in life excessively and sensitively.
Before finishing, I give the words of Krishna about this matter:
Bhagavad Gita (7.11):
I am the strength of the strong, devoid of passion and desire. I am sex life which is not contrary to religious principles, O Lord of the Bharatas [Arjuna].
Then, why should you consider getting your own child as contaminated? Since Krishna has okayed regulated usage if lust to get children, you need not consider it as contamination.
Hope this helps you in deciding between No Mating or Mating to get devotee children.
(Grahastha Rule of ONLY ONCE A MONTH relations and Childlessness! – A Case Study! READ HERE!)