12 TIPS TO FIND A MATCHING DEVOTEE BOY OR GIRL FOR MARRIAGE!
A male devotee (Name hidden) asked like this:
Hare krishna prabhuji, You are doing a very good service for the society. All your answer has good thoughts with logic. I have one question. Could you please clarify? In my home my parents are looking for a girl for marriage but i am looking for a devotee girl who will help me to maintain both material life as well as spiritual life. Please give some solution for this issue. Before i had asked the same question but did not receive any solutions. Currently i am living in confusion only as in my home they are forcing me to marry by 2019.
(1) We can choose from many sources like relatives, friends, neighbours, matrimonial agencies, etc, to find a non-devotee bride or groom. But, if it is to find a devotee groom or bride for marriage, we have to find in a restricted arrangements, ie, in a conservative manner.
(2) First, you should be a regular visitor for your nearby temple/ sathsangha. If you have periodical attendance in more than one temple, it is also fine. The temple manager should be aware of your nature and devotional standing well.
(3) In general, in every temple/ sathsangha, they may extend matrimonial services only for those who contact them. I am aware that in ISKCON, Chennai, there is a senior devotee who is taking care of these matrimonial services. Similarly, in every center/ temple, there may be a senior devotee for this. He/ she may not be doing this as an exclusive service. He may do this in addition to his other services. You should make use of the services of that devotee.
(4) You should give your horoscope and Bio-data with your personal, professional and family details to the temple manager or to the senior devotee who is taking care of these services in every temple.
In small centers/ temples, even the temple manager/ president may do this as a gesture. You can contact him.
(5) They will classify your position according to your devotional status such as new devotee, regular devotee, initiated devotee, like that. Accordingly, he may choose a girl/ boy and talk to him/ her and parents. If they agree, he may inform this to you.
This is the direct method to find a groom/ bride in your own locality itself. If you go to other centers, you may get a bride/ groom from that locality. In every temple, the devotees will be from within the same and neighbouring areas only.
(6) It is not a good practice to talk to a girl/ boy directly. Why? It may create unwanted diversions in the mind of that devotee. If all the devotees start to act like this, the temples will become the centers where the devotees can freely look for the brides/ grooms and interact. This may create an unhealthy atmosphere. There may also be the chances for the misuse of boys/ girls when everyone approaches directly. So, it is good to try through the proper channels.
(7) In case your nearby temple has no such facilities, you may approach the big temple in your state capital. They will definitely have such arrangements. For example, ISKCON’s Chennai center helps the devotees from all over Tamilnadu if anyone registers there. In addition to that local temples also do these services now and then if the requests are genuine.
(8) I always support marrying through known sources including distant relatives, friends and neighbourhood. This will enable you to directly access the activities of the bride/ groom and then decide.
(9) Seeing horoscopes for marriage is supported by many acharyas because marriage needs two like minded persons of almost similar status. Horoscopes can give the idea about the nature of every person, his interest in marital life, etc. If a girl is interested in some sense gratification, but the boy seems mentally renounced, that marriage may become unmatched. So, better to see horoscopes.
(10) However, if the boy and girl are advanced in devotion and well matured to marry ONLY TO SERVE KRISHNA as grahasthas having no serious attachment in sense gratification, they need not see horoscope because their motive is to serve the Lord, not to enjoy the pleasures. If they have some interest in sense gratification also, it is good to see horoscopes with a good astrologer. There may be a devotee in every temple knowing astrology. You can get his service.
(11) Of course, there are some online matrimonial services for the devotees. However, you should verify their authenticity. You can get those details from your temple manager himself.
We can’t expect common commercial matrimonial agencies may have the details of devotees. They may have caste-wise clasifications, not devotional status-wise.
So, contact your temple manager about this matter.
(12) Our website too offer facility to advertise for bride/ groom from the devotee community. You should give the details about your devotional standing, preferences, family, career, e-mail id, etc and an advertising charge for the period of 15 days.
Hope this helps.