Why the scriptures say that the inter caste marriage affect the ancestors?
Actual Question from a girl devotee:
Two families follow sanatana dharma. In this case, is caste a hurdle for a girl and boy to marry from the families? What does caste mean in today’s context.. will their marriage affect their ancestors?
REPLY:
Well, Four Varnas are needed in a society. But, not the caste system that is existing now. Lord Himself created a system of Varnashrama Dharma that classifieds the people in 4 classes based on their profession only. Not birth.
(VARNASHRAMA DHARMA – CAN ONE FOLLOW IT IN THE PRESENT SOCIETY? READ HERE!)
Actually, Brahmanas are to advice the kings and people according to the instructions of scriptures. Kshatriyas are to protect the country from enemies. Vaishyas are to supply food and other materials for the people to live. Sudras are to assist all the other three varnas by working and getting salary.
Thus, if there is no brahmana to guide the people based on the scriptures, the kings & people will become rascals.
If there is no kshatriyas to protect, the country will become under the control of enemy nations and thieves.
If there is no vaishyas to produce grains, vegetables and milk, the world will die of starvation.
If there is no sudras, no other varnas can perform their duties as they need man power in all their activities.
Thus, Krishna wonderfully planned the system. In His system, all are equally important and every varna is the backbone of a society.
(Did Krishna create caste system to divide the society as said by atheists? READ HERE!)
However, with the advancement of kaliyuga, the original varna system disappeared and birth based caste system is existing now. This is not a right system as it leads to the divisions in the society.
Because of this birth based caste system, there are many deviations in every varna, particularly in brahmanas. For example, I took birth in a vedic brahmana family. My parents were very orthodox. One day, when I was 7 or 8, I was eating rice food and my left hand fingers were holding the side dish roasted potato chips. My father had advised that we should not use our left hand for eating. As I took chips through left hand, he took a stick and gave a strong blow on my left hand when I was eating. That pain lasted for 4-5 days. After that, I never use my left hand while taking food even to take side dish.
So, Though I am a brahmana person who came from such an orthodox family, I fell from my brahmana status in the middle when I started business to survive. Because, instead of vedic profession, I was doing a business and earning. So, I must have been called as a vaishya, not a brahmana.
(Are women Priests, Sanyasis and Gurus allowed in Sanathana Dharma? READ HERE!)
However, to regain my brahmana status, I stopped my business and now concentrate only in preaching service throughout the world till I die.
So, such varnashrama system of classification is the real caste system and it is good for the society. Only because some brahmanas misused vedic instructions and this varnashrama dharma, Lord Krishna came as Buddha and opposed vedas. Though vedas are the guiding lights for the society, Lord Himself temporarily opposed it because a section of brahmanas misused it to suppress other communities.
CASE-1: IF YOU ARE NOT A SERIOUS DEVOTEE:
It is better to marry a person within the same caste because, the life style and preferences of both the husband and wife MAY BE the same. If a brahmana girl marries a vaishya boy, she may find it difficult to cope with the boy’s family as the life styles will be different for both brahmanas and vaishyas.
(Being a brahmana or Vaishnava – which is recommended for kaliyuga? READ HERE!)
If a Brahmana marries a vaishya girl, she may find his daily chanting of Gayathri manthra and other manthras as odd and difficult. She may argue with him when he follows the restrictions in mating recommended for brahmanas. So, if a brahmana boy marries a brahmana girl, she can understand the rules and rituals followed by her husband and adjust with him.
So, if possible, try your best to marry within your caste. Failures will be less in same caste marriage compared to mixed marriages, but, failures are not totally ruled out. Only because the inter caste marriages are increasing, there are more and more divorce cases in the courts. In Chennai alone, one third of inter caste marriages end in divorce.
If there is unavoidable situation or if the Naga dosha in your horoscope forces you, you may go for marriage with other castes if you know that the bride or groom is really an adjustable boy/ girl.
(REGULATIVE PRINCIPLES FOR FOUR VARNAS AND ASHRAMAS! READ HERE!)
CASE-2: IF BOTH OF YOU ARE SERIOUS DEVOTEES:
What do you mean by the term DEVOTEES? Just because he is coming to the temple, or wearing religious symbols or clothes on body or speaking of God? That alone is not the requirement to be a devotee! A devotee should be dominated with Satva guna (Mode of goodness) with forgiving nature.
So, though you like to marry a devotee, you must enquire about him thoroughly from his surroundings and particularly friends. Being a devotee member in a spiritual organisation is NOT a CLEAN CHIT or a CONDUCT CERTIFICATE that we can marry him without fear.
Only if a devotee has successfully given up his/ her past life style before his initiation, and have started to live only for pleasing Krishna and have developed material detachment atleast to some extent, he would have forgotten the vasana / samskar of his caste. Otherwise, he will still have the caste based preferences within himself.
See whether that devotee is mentally detached to the level of forgetting his caste background. After that, marry him. That’s all I can say.
(Is sanyasa for woman allowed if she is unmarried at 50 without caretakers? READ HERE!)
In a nutshell:
(1) CASTE IS NOT A BARRIER IF THE BRIDE/ GROOM IS VERY GENTLE , COMPASSIONATE, DECENT, SOFT SPEAKING AND NOT ABUSIVE!
(2) CASTE IS NOT A BARRIER IF THE BOY AND GIRL ARE SERIOUSLY FOLLOWING DEVOTIONAL PRACTICES AND HAVE DEVELOPED SURRENDERED MINDSET TO KRISHNA.
If two serious devotees marry, they will go back to Krishna and hence their ancestors will also get liberated. Such inter caste marriages will not affect the ancestors.
Otherwise, if the boys and girls are just starting level or casual devotees and marry with another caste, then, the ancestors will be affected because their son or grandson can not perform rituals for their ancestors. Because of the inter caste marriage, their lineage is broken and a new mixed lineage is formed. Every sect is backed by a rishi. So, as per the scriptures like Garuda Purana, the children of the parents of mixed community, can not perform the rituals for his parents and ancestors. This is how inter caste marriage affect the ancestors.
(Can the devotees of different castes marry if they follow all devotional rules? READ HERE!)
I do not support castes. But, the members of the same caste are expected to have similar characteristics. That is why, the people like to marry within the same community and avoid Inter caste marriage.
Just compare the followers of our website and the website of a Hollywood actress. Will their taste be similar?
Even the communities in the social media is also like the castes that have the audience having similar choices. Just think of it with a balanced mind. You will understand my point why castes can not be eradicated. Such sections are existing in almost all religions in different manner.
Thus, castes are just the easy way followed by the people to get like minded people.
But, when we give too much of importance for the castes to separate the people, it is not permissible. Castes are just the indicators of the groups of persons of similar preferences. Of course, there may be some deviations from these patterns within the same castes also. However, it is an indication of majority of the people.
Hope you are clear now about how the inter caste marriage affect the ancestors.
(Inter Caste marriages for the devotees and non devotees! A Research! READ HERE!)