Why the dress codes for women when the men walk half open publicly?
Two Questions from two Girl devotees:
(1)
Hare Krishna Rajan Prabhu!!!! U explained that girl should wear sari. But if you see the old sculptures depicting Lord Krishna or other demigods like Lord Shiva and their better halves or say the kings and their queens, the outfits they are wearing, r very exposing the woman’s or men’s important assets even more than what western outfits expose. The Queens attire exposes the chest, waist and other body details just as tight fitting jeans and short t shirts. At least a decent jeans and loose t shirt covers the important body details. If you see the old sculptures on the walls of the ancient temples,they r so sensual. So I feel salwar kameez or decent jeans t shirt is ideal dress for girls. Even dhoti for men also looks half clad.
(2)
“Namastay Sir, In our Dharam is their any kind of dressing way mentioned specially for girls”
REPLY:
In this matter of Why the dress codes for women, I have some liberal thinking but without deviating from the purpose of dress codes.
Why are we advised to follow a dress code in devotional way of life?
(1) A devotee should have the appearance with dignity.
(2) To avoid exposure of body parts that causes an embracing situation, one has to close the body completely.
(3) To show that we are a human being who has to live with a code since we have the responsibility of making a safe and decent society.
(DRESSING & BEHAVIOUR OF VAISHNAVA IN PUBLIC PLACES! READ HERE!)
What else can be the reason for the dress codes for women and men.
We should always remain wearing a decent clothes to close our body. This is the purpose of wearing the clothes.
In spirituality, there are always certain aspects that should not be modified and also certain things that can be modified to suit the changing trends of the society.
As far as, the dress codes for women are concerned, we should give priority for decency, not for WHICH CLOTH. A cloth is to hide our body decently. If we do not wear the clothes, there will be chaos and violations everywhere in this world. People will become shyless and there will be no “decent relations” at all in this world. No control.
So, cloth is the mark of dignity and protects our dignity. There are certain sensitive parts in our body that should be protected SUFFICIENTLY. So, we need a cloth.
So, we should wear a cloth that hides all the sensitive portions without inviting the undue attention of others. That’s all. Some people may wear diamond fixed cloth costing lakhs of rupees. Some wear simple cotton clothes. Both of them hide the same portions of their bodies that have short life time. Purpose is solved in both the cases. But, the first one wasted lakhs of rupees. Second one saved more money by wearing simple cotton dress. That’s all.
(It is wrong going to temples without bathing and wearing unwashed dress? READ HERE!)
A dress should not invite problems for the person wearing that. Actually, a boy or girl is induced naturally when the girls / boys wear glamorous clothes that expose the “actual structure” of body. So, a cloth should be decent. That’s all.
The dress codes are necessary for both the males and females. In my case, I never remain without wearing shirts even in my home. In home, I wear simple clothes, but full cloth. Some neighbours may suddenly come to our home. So, we should always remain decent. I also like the decent dressings from women. Similarly, I too like to remain decent to others as a decent person.
Many males consider that they can remain without shirts because they are males. But, even males should not expose his body to other women as some women may be disturbed with that. Particularly, the adolescent aged girls may get disturbed with such glamorous appearance of men.
So, just wear a decent cloth that fully covers the body. For women/ girls, it is always better NOT TO wear very tight clothes as they may expose the actual structure of our body and hence some weak males may be disturbed.
(What are the recommended colours of clothes to wear in temples? READ HERE!)
The women should recognize the fact that their body’s actual curves and fatty parts may look ODD if they wear a tight cloth. It is the fact that in the creation of God, women are given more fat in certain parts of her body compared to men. Why should others see the actual structure of her body parts?
So, better wear “loose fitting dress” that does not tightly hold the whole body.
All men are not buddhas and all women are not Savitris. There are a certain portion of men and women who have natural weakness of getting attracted because of the planetary position in their horoscope.
Personally speaking, slightly loose/ free Chudidhars / salwars compulsorily with a Shawl are the best dress for girls. I feel that it covers their entire body sufficiently and safely. There is a major benefit in chudidhars. There will be no risk of exposure even accidentally.
(It is wrong going to temples without bathing and wearing unwashed dress? READ HERE!)
In vedic period, there were no tailoring machines. So, they could not stitch their desired types of dress like Pants, Shirts, Chuditars/ salwars, etc. All they knew was making some simple dress like skirts, sarees with linings, dhoties, towels, etc manually using needles. These dress too were worn by affluent people only. Others wore just sarees, half sarees, dhoties, etc.
Therefore, Gopis might be wearing the dress that fully covered their bodies. Nowhere we have seen them wearing awkward looking dress.
Since the skirts type of long dress were also safe for women, they might be wearing them. However, they might not be wearing a skirt that is above the knees.
Since there were no media or facilities for educating the people about the sexual life, some scriptures or paintings were drawn in ‘certain postures’ in the temples so that the people know some secrets of male-female interactions that will help them to perform well after marriage..
Moreover, all the clothes we see in the pictures of ancient women were just imaginary based on the descriptions found in scriptures.
(Tips for using this human body for Krishna, control emotions and thoughts! READ HERE!)
Even now, the women can wear skirt type clothes if they are well below the knees. Not wrong.
However, Salwar/ chuditar with shawl, decently worn saree will be better for women.
As far as skirts and jeans are concerned, they come under casual clothes. They need not be worn in the temples and during auspicious functions. Jeans also show the actual structure of the body of the women and hence it can be avoided atleast in temples.
However, the sight of some men have changed of late because of the impact of media that expose the women like a glamour dolls. In ancient days, the men did not have X-Ray eyes towards the women as we have now a days. We have to keep these facts also in mind and wear a decent dress not to feed the dirty sights of men.
Moreover, chuditars/ salwars have double protection because they have pant also. Whenever the girl/ women fall down, there will not be a risk of exposure.
(QUALITIES OF A PURE DEVOTEE OF KRISHNA! READ HERE!)
In this way, I find chuditars/ salwars better than sarees in protecting the dignity of girls/ women. They will be safe in any situation – even during the sleep.
However, since the sarees are the traditional cloth of India, it can also be worn in temples.
I also request the temples/ sathsanghas to consider allowing the women devotees to come in chuditars/ salwars also considering their safety and the problems faced by them in travel. Though the sarees can be recommended, it need not be made compulsory.
Why I am writing like this?
I remember this incident that happened when I was 15, that shows the importance of the dress codes for women. One of my neighbour girl committed suicide. She was just 17 at that time. Why? She was one day going in a bicycle to purchase something wearing skirt without pant that had full length till the feet. She was riding the cycle in a busy local market that is filled with our area people. Suddenly her cycle touched a small stone and collapsed. So, she fell down in the crowded public bazaar. Her skirt could not hide her body in that crisis. When she fell down, her body was exposed to the entire crowd though she had worn panty. But, as a shy type girl, she felt ashamed as all her area people saw her in some exposed state. She feared how she will face them in future again. So, she immediately came to her home, closed the doors and hanged herself in shame and died keeping a suicide note in a letter to parents. See, just a risky casual cloth cost her life.
(PURITTY or LOVE – WHICH IS MORE IMPORTANT FOR DEVOTIONAL GROWTH? READ HERE!)
Had she worn chudidars, the chudidhar pants would have saved her exposure. We do not know what will happen at any time. So, I always recommend chudidhars/ salwars for girls that is safe for them. Even in sleep, there is no risk of exposure that can be seen in many families. However, the chudidar should not be so thin that also exposes the body. So, better it can be of sufficiently thick cloth. The neck should be “close neck” without allowing exposure while bending. Because there are some ugly minded men who are waiting when a girl will bend.
These are all just some tips for a decent dressing experience. However, if you wear any other decent dress, it’s alright. But, my vote is for free sized Chudidhars/ salwars with shawls, if you ask me. In case, a girl/ women finds the salwar/chuditar not suitable for her body type, she may wear sarees carefully closing the body well.
A cloth should invite respect; Not problems. These tips are applicable for males also. These are just suggestions. Need not be taken as suppression of women’s freedom. All I have written here are for the safety of women from the eyes of SOME men with a corrupted mind.
Hope you are clear now about dress codes for women.
(Eight forms of subtle sex to be avoided by brahmacharis! READ HERE!)