Whom to trust and whom not to trust in this world?
A devotee who asked anonymity asked like this:
“Can you tell me how do we know whom to trust and whom to not in this world ? and How do we come to know whose the correct person to fall in love with … ? Sorry , I know my question is quite silly. Please don’t reveal my identity. Hare Krishna !!!”
Only a Self realized and God realized person will be reliable. BECAUSE HE IS LIBERATED EVEN IN THIS MATERIAL WORLD and he has no business in this planet.
Most others, say, three fourth of the people in this kaliyuga, will definitely cheat you when chance comes. Since many people are pretending as if good people, it will be very difficult to find whom to trust and whom should not in this world. So, we should always be careful with the other materialistic people. And, DO NOT EXPECT A PERSON TO BE GENUINE IN ALL ASPECTS. IT IS NOT POSSIBLE IN THIS MATERIAL WORLD.
(I stopped trusting Krishna because of problems. How to regain my faith in Krishna? READ HERE!)
Why do you long for loving anyone? Love is a natural process. If you feel that some one is genuine, you start to love any person or any other living being. You will love a person according to your past karma. If a person had cheated anyone in his previous life,he will get a cheater as lover. If he had done good for all the others in his previous life, he will get an understanding lover now.
However, there is a fact as per the scriptures that no conditioned soul is perfect. Only the liberated souls are perfect. All of us are imperfect. So, IF YOU LIKE TO LOVE SOMEONE, YOU HAVE TO ACCEPT THEM ALONG WITH THEIR DEFECTS, AS YOU YOURSELF ARE IMPERFECT.
(WHAT ARE THE FOUR DEFECTS OF CONDITIONED SOULS (MAN)? READ HERE!)
So, If you look for a perfect person to love, you can not love anyone in your life.
There is another view: If you see Krishna in every living being, you can love everyone of them. Because, every living being is Krishna’s creation and hence we should not hate anyone. So, love everyone.
If you ask me about loving a girl/boy for marrying, be ready for compromises. Because, one can never get a perfect lover. So, if you find a girl to be suitable to lead a life, marry her after evaluating her family background well. That’s all I can say.
Now, see the nature of all humans as given in a lecture by His Divine Grace A. C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada on October 6, 1969, at Conway Hall, London, England:
“ In the conditioned state, our knowledge is subjected to many deficiencies. The difference between a conditioned soul and a liberated soul is that the conditioned soul has four kinds of defects.
(WHAT IS THE REASON FOR THE RISE OF CHEATING IN THE NAME OF GOD?– A RESEARCH! READ HERE!!)
The first defect is that HE MUST COMMIT MISTAKES. For example, in our country, Mahatma Gandhi was considered to be a very great personality, but he committed many mistakes. Even at the last stage of his life, his assistant warned, “Mahatma Gandhi, don’t go to the New Delhi meeting. I have some friends, and I have heard there is danger.” But he did not hear. He persisted in going and was killed. Even great personalities like Mahatma Gandhi, President Kennedy-there are so many of them-make mistakes. To err is human. This is one defect of the conditioned soul.
Another defect: TO BE ILLUSIONED. Illusion means to accept something which is not: maya. Maya means “what is not.” Everyone is accepting the body as the self. If I ask you what you are, you will say, “I am Mr. John; I am a rich man; I am this; I am that.” All these are bodily identifications. But you are not this body. This is illusion.
(THREE GUNAS (MODES) AND CAUSES FROM BHAGAVAD GITA! READ HERE!)
The third defect is the CHEATING PROPENSITY.
Everyone has the propensity to cheat others. Although a person is fool number one, he poses himself as very intelligent. Although it is already pointed out that he is in illusion and makes mistakes, he will theorize: “I think this is this, this is this.” But he does not even know his own position. He writes books of philosophy, although he is defective. That is his disease. That is cheating.
Lastly, OUR SENSES ARE IMPERFECT. We are very proud of our eyes. Often, someone will challenge, “Can you show me God?” But do you have the eyes to see God? You will never see if you haven’t the eyes. If immediately the room becomes dark, you cannot even see your hands. So what power do you have to see? We cannot, therefore, expect knowledge (veda) with these imperfect senses. With all these deficiencies, in conditioned life we cannot give perfect knowledge to anyone. Nor are we ourselves perfect. Therefore we accept the Vedas as they are.”
He explains our defects like this nicely.
(I FEEL GUILTY OF MAKING SHOW AS DEVOTEE. HOW TO CORRECT? READ HERE!)
So, (i) Love everyone as the product of Krishna; (ii) Accept the people with their strengths and weaknesses.
There is no other way. All of us are defective as said by Srila Prabhupada above.
Because, paramahamsas and Pure devotees will not waste their time in loving for marriage. They would have crossed those stages and situated in Krishna Consciousness.
No need to worry about whom to trust. Only if we are perfect, we must look for perfect associates.
We should accept a person from the group of people with the above four defects only.
Be a spectator of your own life.
Live for serving Krishna. Or, serve Krishna as much as possible using the available resources.
Other things will be taken care by Krishna.
Hope you are clear now about Whom to trust in this world.
(Finding Match for marriage Satisfying both Parents and Krishna! Tips! READ HERE!)