When should a devotee be patient and when should he show our emotions?
Roshini Dubey asked like this:
“Hare Krishna Anna I am re sending you my question. Please reply as soon as possible and help me cut this Gordian knot for my appropriate spiritual growth.
“Do devotees need to cultivate titiksha ( requested by Lord in BG 2.14)? As per Vaishnava Philosophy we are bhakti margi so instead of being fully nirvikar we need to use such forces of kaam , krodha, lobh and moha in the service of Krishna as Hamuman ji utilized his krodh in the service of Lord Rama. So we should utilize such forces appropriately or we should tolerate(titiksha) them. Please give me a definite answer. Thank you. Hare Krishna , Dandvat.”
There is a difference between two statements. If you know that difference, that will solve this doubt.
The advice given by Krishna in B.G 2.14 is the following:
“O son of Kuntī, the non-permanent appearance of happiness and distress, and their disappearance in due course, are like the appearance and disappearance of winter and summer seasons. They arise from sense perception, O scion of Bharata, and one must learn to tolerate them without being disturbed.”
In this sloka, Krishna speaks about the Prescribed duties of every sathaka. Srila Prabhupada too explained this as prescribed duties only.
The advice of Krishna to remain patient bearing the happiness and distress that is unavoidable like winter and summer. We should bear the happiness and distress while discharging our prescribed duties as we bear winter and summer.
For example, as a mother, you sincerely try for a groom for your daughter and give her in marriage. This gives you much happiness that you celebrate well.
However, the daughter complains of the tortures of her husband. This causes distress in you.
You are unable to be happy as you remained when you gave her in marriage.
Here, Krishna’s advice matches.
You did your duty as a mother to arrange a good groom seeing all the possibilities.
But, as per the karma of the daughter, the groom / her husband happened to be a torturing person.
So, instead of getting agitated, you should handle the distressed situation with a balanced mind.
Similarly, some times, we may lose or have troubles in our jobs. Since working and earning is our assigned duty, we should deal with the distressful situation in our jobs with a balanced mind without getting affected by the incidents.
At the same time, involving our senses and emotions in the service to the Lord is different.
When we are tested while doing our assigned duty, we should deal with that patiently.
At the same time, when someone interferes in our service to the Lord, we can show our anger against him to stop him disturbing your service.
When you like to serve Lord along with the spouse and through children, you can marry and use the regulated kama to get children and to cultivate the children as the devotees of Krishna.
Here, you have used the kama to serve the Lord.
Hanuman ji fought back when he was disturbed while serving the Lord Rama or when he saw that his master Rama was disturbed by someone.
This is because, his only business was to serve Rama. Nothing else. So, he used his anger in the service to Rama.
At the same time, when someone pulls Hanuman ji when he was sleeping in his home with his mother, he should show restraint instead of getting angry suddenly.
However, as a kshatriya, he can show his anger to protect himself. I give this example just for an understanding of the concept.
Thus, this is the conclusion:
(1) When you face setback while discharging your own assigned duties, keep restraint.
(2) When you are disturbed while discharging your duties to the Lord (or) when Lord himself is insulted, show your anger to correct the situation.
Hope you are now clear.