What to do if our Prayers are not answered by Krishna?
Two girls and a boy with similar problems and I had grouped their messages and have replied: (Names hidden):
GIRL DEVOTEE-1:
“Hk Prabhuji. i wanted to bcome a C.A. but, i could not pass it. i wanted to get a job in bank n wrote many exams. i did not get. now, ma parents see boy for me. five boys have come to see me. but, no one said yes. i am not ugly. then why this happens for me only?”
GIRL DEVOTEE-2:
Hare krishna. sir i am following your advice sincerely. i am chanting hare krishna regularly. sir i have never thought any bad for anyone still why i am suffering so much? in my surrounding my all friends are very much happy. they all are enjoying their life. its only me who is suffering a lot after regularly praying to krishna. sir a single moment is not there when i m not crying. its hurting me a lot sir, slowly slowly i m losing my patience to bear so much you say sir will god not listen me will he not forgive for the whole life will i suffer like this. please help sir..i really need god to listen my prayer once please sir. Radhe Radhe sir
(3) A BOY DEVOTEE:
I don’t know whatever i m going to ask you is stupidity or out of my ignorance. forgive me if it is. I am 26 male now. I don’t want to get married because I m not yet well settled or financially independent.. I m planning to get hooked may be after 2years… but starting from teenage I tried to fall in love with a girl.. I had concept of true love.. and still has… But im failing.. girl which I truly carried by heart.. got married.. I tried many times afterwards too.. now my age of love and romance is getting over.. I was never able to fall in love.. rather i m not able to concentrate on Krishna feelings too ..is this a sin prabhuji?? what should I do? Why krishna does not answer my prayers?
REPLY:
All of you are lamenting as if your Prayers are not answered by Krishna because of EXPECTATIONS. When a boy or girl love, they expect that their love should face ONLY SUCCESS. Is it possible in all cases? Success and failure are the two sides of a single coin.
Pandavas, particularly, Yudhishtra was defeated in Gambling TWO TIMES and lost his entire belongings and became empty. He was in direct contact with Krishna. He met Krishna regularly and interacted with Him. Still he was defeated. Why this defeat for the friends and relatives of Krishna?
(How is it possible to live without expectations? How? READ HERE!)
Because, Krishna is going to give him success in a particular time. But, Yudhishtra and Pandavas had the karma of losing their belongings and becoming empty handed.
So, Krishna first allowed the karma network to implement the karma of Pandavas and hence gave initial defeats. But, when the Pandavas faced their karma successfully for 13 years in forests, they became relieved from their karma of living in forests.
Now, Krishna gave them success in Kurukshetra war and the Pandavas regained their kingdom. Vyasa dev writes that even Pandavas had to face their karma.
But, what is the difference between devotees and non devotees if karma impacts the lives of all?
Yes… The devotees will DEFINITELY get FINAL SUCCESS if they remain patiently with faith on Lord. But, non devotees have no such guarantee that they will get FINAL SUCCESS. If they had plenty of good karma, they too may succeed finally. But, devotees have DEFINITE FINAL SUCCESS.
Another thing I have to tell here. Final Success means not as expected by you. Krishna knows which will do good for you. If Krishna’s decision matches your decision, you will get the result as expected. If Krishna finds that your desire will do harm for you if okayed, He will not give your expected success. Though He denies it, it will be for your goodness only.
(Will Krishna arrange me a job even if I don’t aim for it to avoid expectations? READ HERE!)
This is the merit and special status we, the devotees have in the considerations of Krishna.
So, always remember that you have the choice of JUST LOVING or TRYING FOR JOBS. But, the result is determined by the Lord because He knows which is good for you according to your karma.
All three of you have fixed that YOU SHOULD GET ONLY THE SUCCESS IN GETTING YOUR LOVER WITH YOU. But, it may even be the start of your hellish life. Who knows? How can you say that getting a girl or boy is the start of a long happiness?
Nobody likes to face the failures though a BIG SUCCESS IS WAITING FOR THEM TO BLESS IN FUTURE. That is why, they lament if their Prayers are not answered by Krishna.
They may cry for a girl working as a clerical assistant. But, they may have the karma of marrying a doctor or Engineer if they wait for some more time. They have no patience. They feel that ONLY THIS GIRL or BOY is suitable for them. They lose their heart. Then suffer.
So, DO NOT expect that ONLY THIS PERSON should become your spouse or ONLY THIS JOB you should get. Just proceed in life taking sincere efforts. Let the time pass in its course. You will naturally get a right match for you.
Ok, how to get rid of such expectations or fixations?
We can not stop expectations, but, we can regulate them towards Krishna. If you truly have faith on Krishna, you will not expect anything materially. Because, Krishna, who gave you this wonderful human birth, will also give whatever you need to proceed in this world.
When Krishna sends every person to this world, He makes all the needs of that person available for his/ her whole life. But, as some people earn excessively, the share of another living being is not available. That is why, this imbalance in this society.
(Sakama, Nishkam & Suddha Bhakti – Which is Superior to follow? Why? READ HERE!)
However, if you just perform your duties leaving the results to Krishna, you will not have agitations. This is the right mindset with which one should work.
Though you expect so many boons, Krishna will give you ONLY THOSE BOONS that will do good to you. You may expect Krishna to give One lakh rupees. But, Krishna might have planned to give One Crore rupees to you.
When Krishna has plans to make you a doctor, you can never get a seat for Engineering though you try many times. Though you get, you can not join that course for some reasons and you will have to join medicine only.
So, if you do not get what you expected, accept what is given by Krishna because that will be the one planned by Krishna.
Thus, leave everything to the discretion of Krishna. You just be relieved and continue your prescribed duties.
If anyone ill treats you; If anyone deserts you; If anyone cheats you; If anyone plans against you; If anyone tests you – in all these situations, just pooh-pooh them and continue your duties if you are straightforward.
If you lose anything, thank Krishna for removing an unwanted thing from you. If you get something, again thank Krishna for His blessings and treat what you get as His prasadam.
So, both the loss and gain are for our good and the mercy of Krishna. This is the mindset of a devotee! You too develop this mindset and be happy.
Read the third chapter Karma Yoga of Bhagavad Gita again and again to develop this mindset.
If our Prayers are not answered by Krishna, that means, they are not good for us.
Develop spiritual desires to get Krishna’s mercy. This is the best way of developing desires. Thereafter, Krishna will take care of your right material needs also. Krishna will never do wrong for us.
This is the right expectation for a devotee. Instead of lamenting that your Prayers are not answered by Krishna, just follow this way of life. Everything will be alright.
(Good Pastimes for the devotees in the place of mundane pastimes! Tips! READ HERE!)