My parents object my ekadasi fasting. What to do?
A girl devotee who requested anonymity asked like this:
“Hare Krishna Prabhuji. Please do not disclose my name. Prabhuji, I have a problem and I need your guidance. my parents have a problem with me fasting on Ekadashi. I try to perform full and sometimes partial fasts but they always object to it. How can I make my parents understand that this is the path I want to follow? Prabhuji please help me. Thank you.”
REPLY:
Frank and Open Discussion makes everything. Even countries get independence because of discussions. Can’t you make them accept your fasting by discussion? Possible.
Of course, the Krishna Conscious practices may seem peculiar to the parents and they may even fear whether we will go as sanyasi. Because, every sanyasi would have started just as an ordinary devotee like you. So, your parents may also fear that you too will become a sanyasi if they encourage such fasting, chanting, etc… They may fear whether you will leave the home and settle in temples.
They also fear that as a girl, their daughter has to maintain stamina and strength to deliver a child. So, they may fear that fasting may weaken them.
Every parent will like that their children should always be with them. So, they may not allow any practice that has the risk of taking their child away from them.
We can say that we are always fighting between maya and Krishna. Krishna pulls us towards Him and we prefer Him. But, the relations are also pulling us towards them and they do not allow us to go near to Krishna.
This fight is always continuing throughout our life. Unless we are strong and consistent in Krishna Consciousness, we can not avoid our falling into the hands of maya.
Now, you have to satisfy both Krishna and your parents. It is possible if you CUSTOMISE YOUR DEVOTIONAL PRACTICES ACCORDING TO YOUR SITUATION.
How?
If your parents object your following ekadasi fast, do not observe full fast. Just observe partial fast till you get married. Except grains and a few other stuffs, you can take most of the preparations on ekadasi. You will not feel tired also. So, your parents will not get agitated. Mean time, frankly talk to them and assure them that you will always their daughter and you will not desert them. Beg them to allow you to chant, observe partial fast and offer worship to Lord daily.
Attend satsangha only for 2-3 hrs on sundays alone. If you are frequently go to temples and spend time excessively there, your parents may get agitated again. Be a moderate devotee till you get married.
Moreover, devotion is heart related. Only the consciousness matters here. Not the external activities alone. So, develop your consciousness more than the external aspects. If you look like a normal girl outside, your parents may feel comfortable. Meantime, develop your Krishna Consciousness within heart by reading the books of Srila Prabhupada, the founder of Krishna Conscious movement. Definitely, your parents will not object if you read books.
While practising Krishna Consciousness alone, talk to your parents about Krishna Consciousness whenever they are in good acceptable mood. Request them to read small books of Srila Prabhupada first. Eg: Perfect Questions and Perfect Answers, Challenge, Science of Self realisation, etc… Thus, you can gradually make them also Krishna Conscious. This will be a good service to Lord.
Pray to Lord to help you in making your parents to understand your efforts in improving in Krishna Consciousness.
Above all, as said by Krishna, only one out of 1000s of people will understand Lord. So, do not worry though your parents do not realise the greatness of K.C. Just you follow it sincerely and become a model to others.
Only if you practice swimming in an opposite stream, you can learn swimming well. Similarly, Krishna Consciousness also has to be practised facing the opposite stream of objections from family members.
Remember that. Do as I advised above.