5 Conditions for a Krishna devotee to marry Non Veg Non devotee!

5 Conditions for a Krishna devotee to marry Non Veg Non devotee!

A Girl devotee (Name hidden) asked like this:

“Hare Krishna Prabhuji! I’m practicing Krishna consciousness for about one and half year. I’m in relationship with a non devotee. We both are of same age but I feel like I’m mentally matured than him. He is a very kind and loving person and he is loyal to me. But he is not interested in devotional services and all. He is a kind of materialistic person and he enjoys materialistic things like watching movies and hanging out with friends and all. He loves eating non vegetarian foods. At starting I was ok with him and nowadays I don’t want him to be so materialistic so I started advising him to leave eating non veg and all. He said that he would try to stop eating non veg but he tells that his parents won’t allow him to become vegeterian. He some times told me that He sometimes hate my love for Krishna because he wants him to be loved more! He is sincerely loving me. But both our taste are different we hardly have a few in common.

When I asked him to become Krishna conscious he told these words “see you love God but I see love as God, I believe in loving people and taking care of them.” He has love for people and love for God but I don’t know why he is not getting into Krishna consciousness? Why is he not getting into reality? He tells that he is spiritual but whenever I talk about Krishna pastimes he shows less attention. I want to spend time talking about Krishna but he wants to spend time talking about materialism. Prabhu please tell me how can I make him understand the reality that Krishna is everything. I want him to be spiritually advanced than me. How can I do that? Please give me some suggestions prabhu.”

REPLY:

You have already loved him. Now, you like to make him Krishna Conscious.

This means, you have loved a person seeing his materialistic features.

If you are this much sincere in Krishna, how could you love a materialistic guy?

For a devotee, love or choice of spouse should come seeing the devotional status of the person.

Of course, I agree that all the devotees may not get Krishna Conscious spouse. But, atleast he should be ready to consider what his lover likes him to do.

Love should involve the sacrifice of ego to please the lover by following what he/she wishes.

(THESE 22 Tips to avoid differences if your husband is not interested in devotion! READ HERE)

I have written encouraging the girls and boys to marry atleast a person worshiping any demigods if they did not get a Krishna devotee because he may consider taking Krishna Consciousness after marriage.

This boy seems to be a guy interested in materialistic activities more.

So, if you marry him, either you should reduce your satsangha/ devotional participation, or, you should make him a devotee.

Since, he is not showing any signs of coming to Krishna even after your sincere attempts, he should atleast assure you to change after marriage after seeing your sincere Krishna Conscious practices.

In such case, you should ask him whether he will allow you to go to the temples and satsangha after marriage and some rituals at home every day.

If he agrees, consider him.

I have seen many women devotees, even initiated devotees, are visiting ISKCON Centers and following devotion though their husbands are non devotees and never come to the temple.  However, they will allow their wives to follow as they wish. This is also acceptable.

If he does not agree, you will have to give up devotional practices or you should say No to him now itself.

However, you can chant secretly though your husband does not allow. But, you may find it difficult to offer food to Krishna since he is a non vegetarian and does not agree to give it up.

Since you have fortunately started to review your choice even before the marriage, you can do something. You should enter into marriage with him only if he agrees with your following conditions.

(Can an initiated devotee attend family functions and cook meat for others? READ HERE!)

5 Conditions for a Krishna devotee to marry a Non devotee Meat eater!

(i) He should not object your going to satsangha and temples.

(ii) He should allow you to chant and offer food to Krishna.

(iii) He and his parents/ siblings should become a vegetarian, or, he should never eat meat at home. If he and they are particular about eating meat, they may eat outside in hotel. He should think of reducing and quitting meat eating gradually.

(iv) He should allow you to read the literatures on Krishna and he too should atleast read for your satisfaction to spend his spare time.

(v) He should not compel you to cook meat at home.

(Should a devotee girl marry a boy who is a meat eater and drinker as arranged by her parents? READ HERE!)

These are the 5 Conditions for a Krishna devotee to marry a Non devotee Meat eater if there is no other way! If he agrees for these conditions, marry him. If not, ask him to leave you.

If you say that you can not give up marrying him, you should sacrifice Krishna Consciousness atleast for the next 10-15 years. You will have to violate the regulative principles.

As a responsible preacher, I can’t advise you to accept him and start cooking meat and stop devotional practices. Krishna will not accept such an irresponsible preaching. Let him eat meat in the hotels till he is able to quit fully.

So, try your best to convince him to accept the five conditions mentioned above if he wants to marry you.

Allow him some time. If he agrees, marry him.

If not, don’t worry.  You are escaping from future problems.

(Should a wife serve a non devotee husband also? READ HERE!)

Sacrificing an unfavourable boy for worshiping Krishna is a great thing. Krishna will show you a good guy who will be a devotee or who will cooperate in or allow your devotional practices as you wish.

This world is wide and there are more than 400 crore males.

Look for a right match sincerely. Most of the ISKCON centers are doing the service of showing a good match for their devotees. So, contact your temple president or manager and tell your expectations and register your details there. Or, you can also advertise in our site as mentioned in THIS PAGE.

Hope these tips are useful.

(A Devotee wife and Non Devotee husband –  How to manage? KNOW HERE!)

Author: RAJAN

RAJAN from Tamil Nadu, India, a Life Patron and an Initiated Devotee being in ISKCON for nearly three decades, serves anonymously to avoid Prominence and crowd as an insignificant, Humble and Neutral Servant for all the devotees of Krishna! He promotes Social media forums and this blog-website as e-satsangha (e-forums) blessed with Lakhs of followers, to give Spiritual Solutions for all the Material Problems of the devotees since 2011! He writes friendly and practical tips to practice devotion (i) without hurting the followers of other paths, (ii) without affecting the personal and career life, and (iii) without the blind, superstitious and ritualistic approach! He dedicates all the glories and credits to his Guru and Krishna.

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