Is having association with friends of other religions & Sects wrong?
A male devotee (Name hidden) asked like this:
“Haribol namaste Hare Krishna Prahabu, my question is…rejecting the social gatherings invitations, for staying at home always, for being alone always… this is being introvert or thats what you called a pride? or just I m being so picky? I m worried frown emoticon pride is bad right? so can you help me to distinguish what is being introvert and pride??? and what should i do to change this mind set … i have sets of friends:
-some are christian followers they go to the church every sunday, they young professionals and I m still studying and yeah i respect their for being christians but when I m with them i feel that i m not belong because were not the same philosophy because i know Krishna so i choose to distance myself to them. but were good friends, i have comm. with them through fb and not shown up with them personally…
-other set of friends are volleyball player because i m varsity in my school, some of them are gays. so now i choose to distance myself again because of the past issue that shared with you…so now i dont play volleyball anymore…
-last sets of friends are my high school friends… we meet once a year but we have communication through social media sites… hmmm i called them friends because they don’t forget me… but i cant share my personal life with them…
– i have my best friend who distance himself from me because he needs to focus in his personal life… even comm. in fb we dont have. yesterday is my birthday but i didnt received any greetings from him…
-My family is supportive and i m very thankful… i wish i can give back the goodness they gave to me they know krishna also but they are not full time devotee like me…
I called myself as friendless for being picky? what do you think it is a pride or being introvert?:(
Thank you. Hare Krishna Prabhu Haribol!
REPLY:
This is the mistake most of our devotees make.
Many devotees consider having association with friends of other religions & Sects wrong!
In our temples, we are advised to be selective in association and we should associate only with Krishna Conscious people.
This advice is meant ONLY FOR having deep association with the friends from other religions and communities. That means, to encourage us to spend our quality time in the activities related to Krishna.
(How to deal with the Material Attachment, Detachment & Devotee Association? READ HERE!)
If we associate deeply with the atheists or the people of other sects, we may forget Krishna and divert from our accepted path, because our discussions will go in the direction that will attach us more materially.
This does not mean, we should never talk to them, help them and get helps from them.
Talking to others, helping others or getting help from others are different from associating with others.
Remember, when we are not staying in the temples, but, are running life as a grahastha or outside brahmachari, we can’t run our life depending only on the services from Krishna Conscious devotees.
Temples do not supply vegetables, milk, grains, oils, clothes, etc., for us. They are the places where we can practice to cultivate the athma, not the bodies. Temples are not the business houses.
Temples and Krishna Consciousness can take care of our athma only. But, we have to maintain our bodies also.
We need to cut the hairs regularly;
We need to clean our gardens engaging the servants;
We need to engage a maid or nurse to manage the elders in our family.
(15 Tips to follow the right way of maintaining the association of devotees! READ HERE)
If your water pump got failed, we need to call a technician. He may not be Krishna devotee. Should we avoid to call him?
If we are ill, we go to a doctor. Should we search for a Krishna Conscious doctor?
If we are threatened, we go to the police. Do we go to any Krishna Conscious police?
Impossible.
Where should we go to maintain our bodies?
For that, we need other people only.
Again I say, TALKING AND DEALING ONLY WITH KRISHNA CONSCIOUS PEOPLE IS IMPOSSIBLE.
I AM PRACTICALLY SPEAKING AND I NEVER SPEAK IMPRACTICALLY.
However, we can have the association of Krishna devotees as much as possible to come up in Krishna Consciousness.
(I don’t have the association of devotees. Can’t I chant and love Krishna? READ HERE!)
At the same time, have some nice words with the other people also though we have no deep association with them. To milkmen, vegetable seller, Grocery seller, neighbour people, those who help us, etc.
What is wrong in this?
Speaking with kind words with the other people, even to the atheists, does not mean associating with them. They are also part of our day to day life. So, we can’t avoid them.
Just because we are Krishna devotees, we should not go away from this world and we should not avoid the common people.
Remember, if the farmer (he may be an atheist or a person from other religions or communities) does not grow grains and vegetables, we, the Krishna Conscious people can not have food.
(ASSOCIATION MAKES A PERSON – STORY! READ HERE!)
If there are no Milkmen, we can’t have milk in our flats and nuclear homes.
So, we need all the people in our life. They are also part of our life. So, we can not expect the spiritual organization or the temple we are attached to, will fulfill our body needs also.
So, just because you are a devotee, do not hate other people. Have good, but formal contacts with them also and have limited, formal and needful interactions with them.
Again I say, use devotee association as a tool to purify the athma. For the bodily needs like food, medicines, etc., we need other people also. You need not have close & deep association with them. But, We can’t avoid them.
Similarly, if you don’t have even a formal contacts with the neighbours, they will not come to help us even when we are in danger.
So, talk to all cordially but limitedly. Never avoid them totally. Never stand alone in the society and remain a good Krishna Conscious devotee among this mixed group of people.
If we sincerely follow devotion and also remain in contact with the other people, they may one day hear about following devotional life and they too may become a Krishna devotee.
Remember, TODAY’s MATERIALISTIC PEOPLE MAY BE TOMORROW’s DEVOTEES!
We too were materialistic in the past. Some other devotees’ merciful association made us devotees.
Be careful in only one danger: Use your contacts with the materialistic people to give Krishna Consciousness to them, not to get the materialistic contents from them that may make us fall down. To protect yourself from the materialistic environment, you should make yourself strong in sadhanas and purity.
This is my standing advice for all and for all the time. I too am following this.
Hope you are clear about having association with friends of other religions & Sects!
(Is it right for a devotee distancing himself from friends and relatives? READ HERE!)