Is loving full time brahmachari devotees wrong?
Two Questions from two Girl devotees:
I have question Prabhuji..My humble request to you to reply..Question is : Is loving a Senior Brahmachari preacher is an offence? I mean I love a person & he is from our vaishnav community only, in fact he is a senior Brahmachari preacher..But I don’t know how I fall for him..Now I’m suffering day & night..Burning inside every sec..He is a very well known personality, I don’t want to bring any stain in his fame..Just want a little bit love in exchange of love, nothing else..Now the first problem is I can’t express my feelings to him & second problem is I don’t know what to do..Plz guide me Prabhu..I’m in a tremendous problem.
(2) Another girl asked this ‘dangerous’ question:
“Is it also wrong if we fell in love with our Siksha Guru, who is teaching/preaching u Krishna Bhakti. Pl don’t mention my name while answering this question.”
(1) Loving full time brahmachari devotees:
This is happening everywhere though not advisable. The materialistic LOVE, LONGING, FEELINGS, etc need not be used in devotional service, as there will be no difference between the devotee community and outside world.. A girl devotee finds a boy devotee suitable to marry. This is the decent level of choosing the life partners.
(Eight forms of subtle sex to be avoided by brahmacharis! READ HERE!)
Any girl devotee can marry any boy devotee if she finds him suitable to marry and continue devotional practices after marriage.
However, the approach should be decent and through the proper channel, not in a way of inducing/ tempting each other. That’s all.
Most of the “Resident brahmacharis” prefer to stay in the temples because they wanted to devote all their time for Krishna. They do not devote themselves to the responsibilities of the grahastha life.
If the devotee you mentioned is a “resident brahmachari”, I request you to leave him peacefully without disturbing. Let him continue his service to the Lord full time.
Since his mindset will be against the grahastha responsibilities, a girl devotee should not create any feelings in his mind.
So, my advice is, one should never disturb any devotee with tempting type of words or actions as they might have dedicated their life for Krishna Consciousness.
(HOW GIRLS AND BOYS FALL VICTIMS OF LUST ? BOYS PRAISED MY BEAUTY AND EXPLOITED ME. WHAT TO DO? READ HERE!)
If such extra thoughts arise in their mind, those girl devotees should marry the devotee boys immediately with the advice of her nearest temple president or senior women devotees.
If a devotee likes to get married and needs a devotee wife/ husband, he/ she will give his/ her details and expectations to the local temple president or manager. He maintains a data bank of devotees. He may suggest some boys/ girls to you to marry. If it is agreeable to you, you can marry that devotee. So, a devotee should be approached for marriage ONLY THROUGH the temple president or the devotees who have been assigned with such responsibilities in every temple.
In case you hesitate to deal with the temple president or manager, you may request the senior women devotees to see a groom for you. They will definitely help you.
In some cases, the parents may also deal with this. But, the devotees should not take any decision on their own without consulting their temple president or parents.
Go to the temples and practice in the devotional practices. Forget these extra thoughts. Come to the spiritual platform.
(Tips for using this human body for Krishna, control emotions and thoughts! READ HERE!)
Be in touch with your senior women devotees in your nearby temple. Association with the senior women devotees, reading the literature on Krishna and Chanting the Holy Name of Krishna will make you a devotee with focused mind.
If you do so, Krishna will show you a suitable groom as chosen by Him.
My request to all girl devotees is that they may consider if the male brahmachari devotees propose them. This shows that this male devotee is interested in marriage life. When a male devotee proposes, the girl devotee should immediately take the help of the parents and temple president. The girl and boy devotees should avoid maintaining private communications and roaming everywhere together. They should behave as decently as possible as devotees.
If a girl proposes first to the male brahmacharis, they may get disturbed if they had been in a decision to dedicate for Krishna’s service avoiding marriage. So, the girl devotees should avoid proposing the male brahmacharis.
One should go to the temple to worship Krishna, learn about Krishna and associate with the devotees. Not FOR loving full time brahmachari devotees or to involve in any other material activities;
(Are Inter Caste marriages prohibited by the Scriptures? Is it allowed for devotees? READ HERE!)
In particular, we must behave in a temple in such a way that we do not attract anyone materially. Decent dressing and decent approach with others including opposite sex.
We should not consider Siksha gurus as ordinary persons because they have been given to you by Krishna to elevate you in devotional way of life.
So, Our scriptures advise us to honour the Siksha gurus also as the arrangement of Krishna Himself. A siksha or diksha guru should not be seen with the material thoughts.
So, thinking of them with the material love is the greatest offence. So, such thoughts must be stopped. Such thoughts should never arise in the minds of devotees.
(I am disturbed to see girl and boy devotees loving inside the temples. What to do? READ HERE!)
A girl devotee may choose a brahmachari boy by contacting through the senior women devotees or temple manager/ president after knowing whether he has idea to marry. Direct discussions and interactions may be avoided not to pollute the devotional atmosphere.
As far as loving a siksha guru is concerned, she will be committing great offence by loving, or, even thinking of loving her spiritual teacher.
Please spare those devotees who do not like to marry and dedicate themselves for the service of the Lord.
Hope this clears the doubts about loving full time brahmachari devotees.
(I do not get married though I am a devotee, but, my cousin, a non devotee is to get married. Why? READ HERE!)