I lost interest in devotion and stopped going to temple because of failures. What to do?
A male devotee (Name hidden) asked like this:
“Hare krishna anna haribol. I am in much agony and much disturbed infact always in fear i dnt know why? Before few months my wife and i met with an accident from then my mind is filled with an agony and i am unable to forget that
That month i too failed in my exam i hv forgotten how to live this life always i am in fear and hv also left satsang since few months. I am loosing intrest in devotion and life both. Plz become my guru and guide me. without ur help i will nt be able to cross this ocean of misery. Fear of loosing is always taunting me it haunts me always ans has made my life hail. Plz anna atleast guide me how to skip this fear i am always in fear”
REPLY:
Only the patients suffering physically and mentally go to the hospitals.
The sathsanghas and temples are also like hospitals. The devotees visiting to the temples/ sathsanghas are suffering from miseries of life. So, there is no other way to get relief from miseries. Of course, we should put our efforts. At the same time, we should seek the support of God to succeed in our efforts.
Tell me atleast a single person who has no problems. Even the billionairs will have some kind of problems such as non cooperating spouse, problems with tax, competitors in business, ups and downs in business that may cost heavy loss, betrayals by partners/ associates, health issues etc.
The poor people working in agriculture, construction industry, etc, do not subscribe to diabetes. If a person is comfortably living, he faces diabetes and takes tablets throughout the life.
One of the India’s topmost businessmen has no children. He has plenty of crores of money. But, his companies are now going to the employees after his retirement.
At the same time, even a beggar has many children and gets one every year.
Thus, everyone has problems. But, they need not be the same.. The type of problems may vary. But, everyone has to face problems.
Earth is called karma bhoomi. Only those who are destined to face both happiness and miseries are given birth in the earth. In case you never did any sins in your previous birth, you would have taken birth in heavenly planets. Had you done only sins, you would have taken birth in hellish planets and live there for decades or even centuries.
In this birth, you have some goodness also. You have good health, good family to support you and good people to advise you.
You have everything to take your life further. But, you are crying for what you lost.
In fact, you have not lost anything. You are still alive after the accident.
You failed in the exam. But, you are given more chances to pass the exam.
How can you blame Krishna and devotion for your carelessness that caused the accident and your not studying properly that gave failure in exam?
We usually blame the god for all our own mistakes.
A company sells washing machines. Washing made easy with these washing machines. But, you only should operate the machine to wash the clothes. The company will not wash for you.
The company has printed in the Washing machine User manual to operate the machine atleast for 15 minutes and use 50 grams of washing powder to get good washing. If you use it just for five minutes with 25 grams of washing powder and blame the company for bad quality of washed clothes, is it good?
Krishna has given this wonderful machine of body. Can anyone manufacture a machine like our body?
Having such a powerful body that can do wonders, you did not study well and you did not obey the traffic rules.
Now, you are blaming the God and devotion.
Whose mistake is this?
What is the loss for Krishna if you stop visiting His temple?
The loser is you, not Him.
He has mercifully given this human life for you.
Even the visually challenged people go to busy streets and sell something and manage their families. Whenever I see them working had under the hot sun, my eyes automatically shed tears.
Once, I saw such a visually challenged guy selling incense sticks on a very busy and risky road. I took Rs.100 and gave to him to go home early since the sun is hot.
Do you know what he said?
“Sorry sir, I don’t accept anything free. I don’t want that money. Please, if you have the need for incense sticks, please buy one or two packs of it. That is enough.”
I was shaken by his words.
Do you know, I am buying incense sticks for decades only from visually challenged people since then? They come to my home and sell them. I give preference for those visually challenged people only, as far as incense sticks, dhoops, etc are concerned. If we discourage their hard work, how will they survive? They want to work and live. So, we should encourage their outstanding working spirit.
Even I was updating this site sitting beside the dead body of my mother and even when I was in I.C.U in the hospital fighting for my own life for 3 days. Can you imagine a devotee with heart difficulty updating the sites from ICU using laptop, getting special permission from the doctors? Do you know how much I fought with the doctors to take laptop in the ICU? Can anyone take laptop to ICU? I did it and updated the sites lying on bed keeping the laptop on my ailing chest.
Even now (as in May 2019), I am under regular follow up visits to the hospitals to strengthen my heart that was affected by Viral Cardiomyopathy recently (Enlargement of heart due to virus attack). Though it is curable, if I lift some heavy materials, I may die even now. Doctors in this site know that it will take many months for the heart to fully recover and till that, I have to be very careful. I am drinking just 1250 – 1500 ml of water a day even in this severe summer because I have to reduce water for 4-5 months. Just imagine how difficult to reduce water in cruel summer. I can’t even drink enough water (Cold Water is the only drink I like very much in life).
Still, I am regularly updating the site FREE OF COST with the monetary support of some devotees (They are doing even without publicity that is great. So, it qualifies as Pure and Selfless Service!) and serving as usual solving the queries/ chats, etc with full spirit without showing my difficulty/ pains to them.
Why should I update a site for Krishna and devotees in such serious conditions?
Because, this is the service to Krishna and Vaishnavas. Lakhs of people are following that. Even poor people should be allowed to read and know about Krishna and also to take part in this service through any kind of supports. We should accept whatever support they do for us. Those who know the value of the benefits given by this service and the pains behind this service and those who is able to support will support this service.
So instead of our own satisfaction, the satisfaction of our dependants is important. I am the admirer of Srila Prabhupada’s hard work in his old age. He continued his journey to U.S.A to spread Hari Nam even after two heart attacks on board Jaladhutha ship. Such a dedication. Those who are telling themselves as his followers should also have the same spirit.
So, think how the people in this world are working. Where do you lack?
Did you find out?
See, people are working everywhere in spite of their many severe problems.
Where are you? Why are you crying?
Just think all I said and start to be very careful and sincere in life instead of blaming Krishna.
All the best.