What is the eligibility to be a friend for Krishna like Arjuna?
Actual Question from a woman devotee:
“Radhe radhe… I read somewhere that krsna is our eternal frnd.. Everyone leaves us but not kaanha. If we become friends with krsna everyone becomes our friend. Also it was said jisme matlab hota hain use dosti nahi kahaa jaata. Please tell something about getting His Friendship Radhe radhe. please dont let others know my identity. Am v much thankful on behalf of all. Thank u and keep going! Krsna krsna”
REPLY:
Why not?
It is possible. Krishna is very merciful. He can be approached with different bhawas (Mindsets). ‘Friendship Bhawa’ is also one among them.
Srila Prabhupada says in Srimad Bhagavatam 3.27.4, Purport:
“The only friend is Kṛṣṇa. One should try to raise the consciousness of the conditioned soul to the platform of understanding that Kṛṣṇa is his actual friend. If one makes friendship with Kṛṣṇa, one will never be cheated, and he will get all help needed. Arousing this consciousness of the conditioned soul is the greatest service, not posing oneself as a great friend of another living entity.”
(FIVE PRIMARY RASAS (RELATIONSHIPS) AND SEVEN SECONDARY RASAS ONE CAN HAVE WITH KRISHNA! READ HERE!)
However, we ourselves should make us qualified to be a friend of Krishna. We can take Arjuna as the best example. He was very humble and accepted whatever Krishna suggested him.
He had full faith on Krishna that is the first eligibility to be a friend of Krishna.
Friendship means “Giving and Taking the Pure Love”. Unless you give love, you have no right to claim love from others.
Even among the people,
Can a good person have friendship with a thief?
Can a disciplined person maintain friendship with an indisciplined person?
Why? Because, there is no equality. No equal status. Thus, only those who are eligible to be friends can maintain friendship comfortably.
Equal status means having good purity of Soul, thoughts and body. It can be achieved when we reduce material attachments and expectations! Because Krishna is the ultimate renounced Supreme Person.
(How to love Krishna? READ HERE!)
Similarly, we can’t just easily keep telling that I am a friend of Krishna. It is not a casual friendship. Any relation with Krishna is eternal. So, Purity is the first requirement to maintain ANY relationship with Krishna. Of course, Krishna accepts us as His friend. No doubt. However, we should improve our eligibility and become pure or atleast take efforts to become pure.
Srila Prabhupada writes in CC Madhya 19.203, Purport:
“When a devotee reaches the stage of pure, unalloyed devotion, especially in friendship with Kṛṣṇa, he forgets the Lord’s opulences, although he sees them, and he considers himself equal to Kṛṣṇa. There is no question of actually comparing oneself to Kṛṣṇa, but because the devotee is so advanced in Kṛṣṇa consciousness, he is able to behave with Kṛṣṇa as he would with an ordinary man.”
If a person who has spoiled the lives of 100’s of persons likes to maintain friendship with Krishna, will Krishna come forward?
No. Krishna will not even be visible to him. Because, he has been hidden by maya like the glass plate is hidden by smoke. When the glass plate is blackened with smoke, how can we see the objects through it?
Like that, when our inner vision has been hidden by maya, we can’t see and maintain any kind of relationship with Krishna.
If you like to meet Krishna and maintain any relationship with Him, first you must atleast try to purify yourself. You must try to become PURE as much as possible.
(Is initiation (diksha) compulsory to get the love of Krishna? READ HERE!)
You must surrender to Krishna as done by Arjuna. (Krishna is in the ultimate renounced state when He accepted Gopis! Because, He did not accept them for His pleasure, but, to fulfill their prayers!)
So, If you like to be a friend of Krishna, you must improve in the qualities of Krishna.
You can’t say: “I love my mom; I love my dad. I love my brother & sister. I can’t live without them. Mean time, I also love Krishna”
This is not possible. If you are very much attached with your kith and kins, you can’t attach yourself with Krishna. Only when you skip the attachment with this material world, you will be able to interact with krishna.
Gopis got Krishna as Lover after 100s of births of penance. They were in the thoughts of Krishna though they were living with their husbands. That is also the liberated state.
Arjuna was 100% surrendered to Krishna. So, he got Krishna as friend.
(Can I consider Krishna in all relations as Parent, Child, husband and Guru? READ HERE!)
Similarly, you too must become as pure as possible like Gopis and Arjuna. If you come to that state, Krishna will readily accept you as friend.
Purity comes because of detaching from impurities, ie, material attachments.
For detachment, should you go out of your family?
No.
You be with your family. But, keep your heart with Krishna. Don’t develop attachment with family, but, perform your duties without fail. Remember that all these material relations and material things are bodily and temporary in this world.
Therefore, lead the family life as a duty of maintaining the world order. Nothing else. Make your home as temple by following regular pujas, offerings and chanting, Reading Krishna related good books (like Bhagavad Gita, Srimad Bhagavatham, Nectar of Devotion, etc). Practice Krishna Bhakti from your family itself. When your attachment with Krishna increases, your material attachments will automatically come down.
Stage by stage, you will come to the Pure devotion stage called Prema.
(Do we compulsorily need association of devotees to love Krishna more (though not available)? READ HERE!)
At that stage, Krishna will expose Himself to you automatically since your spiritual status would have been opened because of the absence of the impact of maya (Attachments) on you.
Now, you can maintain any kind of relation with Krishna as you like, as a friend, father, Guru, child, lover, etc.
The point that I come to insist is: Though Krishna will be willing to accept us, let us take efforts to purify ourselves to associate with Krishna by following four disciplinary regulative principles such as No meat eating, No intoxication, No gambling and No illicit sex. In addition to these four impurities, we should also abandon another major impurity that hides Krishna from us – It is our material attachment.
This is confirmed by Sri Rupa Gosvami in Nectar of devotion:
“Nectar of Devotion 41:
“There are three divisions among Kṛṣṇa’s friends: some are eternally in friendship with Kṛṣṇa, some are elevated demigods, and some are perfected devotees. In all of these groups there are some who by nature are fixed in Kṛṣṇa’s service and are always engaged in giving counsel; some of them are very fond of joking and naturally cause Kṛṣṇa to smile by their words; some of them are by nature very simple, and by their simplicity they please Lord Kṛṣṇa; some of them create wonderful situations by their activities, apparently against Kṛṣṇa; some of them are very talkative, always arguing with Kṛṣṇa and creating a debating atmosphere; and some of them are very gentle and give pleasure to Kṛṣṇa by their sweet words.”
Thus, Even if we take some small efforts for the above purification, Krishna will catalyze our efforts to make us successful in our efforts.
This purification is advisable because Krishna is 100% pure. Therefore, let us too try our best to make ourselves pure as much as possible. Krishna will take care of the rest of the things.
Hope you are now clear about the eligibility to be a friend for Krishna like Arjuna.
(Which relation I can maintain with Krishna to show my love? READ HERE!)