Helping others without attachment to avoid karma & Rebirth! Tips!
A male devotee (Name hidden) asked like this:
“Hare Krishna prabhu ji, Dandavat pranam. As you clarify the general doubts devotee have, I like to ask you a query, which is constantly going on from some months.
As I am practicing KC and a helpful person, I like to help others much whatever I can, what happened is many of my friends started to share their personal problems to me, 5 Years passed in between, in starting I didn’t thought much of it as problem, but in due course of time they kind of dependent on me for their emotional support, and now I am not able handle them, because they think I will be helping them always, as they are suffering in their lives, they want me to be there with them and heard whatever they say, What I did that I have blocked them completely to avoid any message from them and also meeting them, As I have also going through tough time, handling others is becoming very troublesome for me as it is affecting me and my studies, what should I do in such case prabhu ji, should I take it as my karma that they are bothering me, or I can disconnect them, how should go about new people whom I think I should help, I am very puzzled in this matter. Please hide my name, If you post this in website.”
REPLY:
To avoid emotional bond while helping others, we should Help others without attachment, attractions, aversions, expectations, etc.
If you help others with attachment, attractions, aversions, expectations, etc., it will definitely give rebirth to reward you in the next birth.
(Rules to help others! Should we help or allow them to face karma? READ HERE!)
As a byproduct, you will also lead a comfortable life in the next birth for having helped others in this birth.
Developing an emotional bond with the seekers of help may cost your time and mood.
When the number of beneficiaries increases, you will find it difficult to manage.
Instead of blocking their numbers after that, avoiding developing bond should be the wise option.
In my decades of experience in counselling thousands of devotees, I have guided the devotees in almost all types of problems that exist in the life.
But, I have not developed further discussions on that matter beyond a limit.
I do them professionally but with kind and merciful approach.
In the horoscope service and counselling service, I have been dealing with the confidential and also some grave problems written by the devotees.
(What is the Karma if our help hurts someone unexpectedly? READ HERE!)
The problems of the devotees usually make my heart painful. I used to feel “How painful this situation will be for this devotee”.
At the same time, I have to be balanced in my approach in the horoscope service and counselling services to avoid mistakes, delay, etc.
But, I have to admit that dealing more with the problems of others affects my psychology. I myself have to lose my peace.
My mind, ie, psychology easily gets affected because of dealing with the problems of others.
However, what to do?
We have to help hundreds of people in distress. In your case, you have to help more people.
So, we should stop with guiding them. We should not deeply involve in their family matters that may lead to developing bond while helping others.
If a third person (you) involves in a person’s life getting called by a family member, other family members may not like your involvement in their family matters.
Or, you may have to speak hearing the plea of only one person. There may be some other unknown issues between them.
(Krishna Helps To Clear the Karma of Devotees! A Stunning Proof! READ HERE!)
So, if you deeply involve in the matters of others, it may cut our nose at a point of time. And, you may lose your image.
So, firstly, don’t give solutions unless you are asked.
Next, if you are asked, think in a balanced way and give a solution without partiality.
After giving solution, just stop with that.
Now, it is their duty to follow your advice.
If their karma permits, they will follow your advice.
Don’t overact by following them up by enquiring what happened.
Everyone is facing the reactions for their previous karma.
So, if they are destined to get the advice of others and get benefited, they will be able to positively use your advice and get benefited.
So, if you want to help anyone who seeks your help, do if it is possible for you, but without attachment, attraction, aversion, expectations, etc
After helping them, just leave them free. Tell them not to approach you further unless they need further advice.
This may help you in helping others without attachment and in preventing their dependency with you after getting your help.
Simply speaking, help if requested and if you can. Just help without attachment just as a help and then leave him free.
This will ensure that we are helping others without attachment.
(Will the beggars’ karma come to us if we help the beggars? READ HERE!)