How to fast for Ekadasi if Parents object Ekadasi fasting?
A girl devotee who requested anonymity asked like this:
“Hare Krishna Prabhuji. Please do not disclose my name. Prabhuji, I have a problem and I need your guidance. my parents have a problem with me fasting on Ekadashi. I try to perform full and sometimes partial fasts but they always object to it. How can I make my parents understand that this is the path I want to follow? Prabhuji please help me. Thank you.”
REPLY:
Frank and Open Discussion makes everything. Even countries get independence because of discussions. Even USA and IRAN have come to an agreement ending the war that affected the economy of the whole world. Then, Can’t you make the parents accept your fast by discussing with them frankly and patiently? It is Possible.
Of course, the Krishna Conscious practices may seem peculiar to the parents and they may even fear whether their children may become a sanyasi. Because, every sanyasi would have started just as an ordinary devotee like you. So, your parents may also fear that you too will become a sanyasi if they encourage such fasting, chanting, etc… They may fear whether you will leave the home and settle in temples.
(Eligibility & Timing to become a Sanyasi? Can a Sanyasi Marry? READ HERE!)
The materialistic parents feel that their children too should materially achieve like others and should proudly travel by their own car, live in their own house, etc.!
They also fear that as a girl, their daughter has to maintain stamina and strength to deliver a child. So, they may fear that fasting may weaken them.
Every parent will also like that their children should always be with them. So, they may not allow any practice that has the risk of taking their child away from them.
We can say that we are always fighting between maya and Krishna. Krishna pulls us towards Him and we prefer Him. But, the relations are also pulling us towards them and they do not allow us to go near to Krishna.
(What to do if the parents object going to ISKCON? READ HERE!)
This fight is always continuing throughout our life. Unless we are strong and consistent in Krishna Consciousness, we can not avoid our falling into the hands of maya.
Now, you have to satisfy both Krishna and your parents. It is possible if you CUSTOMISE YOUR DEVOTIONAL PRACTICES ACCORDING TO YOUR SITUATION.
How?
If your parents object your following ekadasi fast, do not observe full fast. Just observe partial fast till you get married. Except grains and a few other stuffs, you can take most of the preparations on ekadasi. You will not feel tired also. So, your parents will not get agitated. Mean time, frankly talk to them and assure them that you will always their daughter and you will not desert them. Beg them to allow you to chant, observe partial fast and offer worship to Lord daily.
(What if the Parents & family object getting initiation (diksha) now? READ HERE!)
Attend satsangha only for 2-3 hrs on sundays alone. If you frequently go to temples and spend time excessively there, your parents may get agitated again. Be a moderate devotee till you get married.
Moreover, devotion is heart related. Only the consciousness matters in devotion. Not the external activities alone. So, develop your consciousness more than the external aspects. If you look like a normal girl outside, your parents may feel comfortable. Meantime, develop your Krishna Consciousness within heart by reading the books of Srila Prabhupada. Definitely, your parents will not object if you read books but behave like a normal girl.
While practising Krishna Consciousness silently, talk to your parents about Krishna Consciousness whenever they are in good acceptable mood. Request them to read small books of Srila Prabhupada first. Eg: Perfect Questions and Perfect Answers, Challenge, Science of Self realisation, etc… Thus, you can gradually make them also Krishna Conscious. This will be a good service to the Lord.
(How to follow devotion in irresponsible family without any support? READ HERE!)
Pray to Lord to help you in making your parents to understand your efforts in improving in Krishna Consciousness.
Above all, as said by Krishna, only one out of 1000s of people will understand Lord. So, do not worry though your parents do not realise the greatness of K.C. Just you follow it sincerely and become an example to follow b others.
Only if you practice swimming in an opposite stream, you can learn swimming well. Similarly, Krishna Consciousness also has to be practised facing the opposite stream of objections from family members.
Remember that. Do as I advised above.
After marriage with a devotee boy, follow as you like.
(If the parents object our devotion, how to follow it convincing them? READ HERE!)
(Is fasting secretly for Ekadasi right to avoid the Parents’ anger? READ HERE!)