Why Same Gotra marriage is prohibited? Can they do Vedic rights?
A Girl devotee (Name hidden) asked like this:
“Hare Krishna Prabhuji. Prabhuji I read one article. There it was mentioned that scripture says that those kids whose parents belong to same gotra have no right to do any Vedic or religious activities.
This literally is killing me within as my parents have same gotra. Am I impure? Don’t I have any right to do bhakti or do marriage or read shastras? Don’t I have right to read Bhagvad Gita, Srimad Bhagvatam or any other scriptures? Don’t I have right to chant? Prabhuji how will I live like this with such a guilt? I asked one Goswami. He said you don’t have right to do anything. I am an astrologer. I don’t perform any poojas on behalf of clients. I suggest simple and Krishna Conscious remedies like to chant Hare Krishna Mahamantra, read Bhagvad Gita, chant Narayan Kavach and other Krishna Conscious remedies.
Prabhuji wont I get bhakti of Krishna? Will I go to hell? I read alot in this matter and this has literally broke my heart. I am feeling so shameful and sinful. It’s not my fault. For sure Bharaman brought an alliance proposal and marriage was done by him only. He didn’t mentioned anywhere. In Roka only it’s asked what’s the gotra of bride and groom. Then also he didn’t told anything.”
REPLY:
You need not go to hell.
You need not fear to chant and do sadhanas.
See, Gotra refers to a genetic lineage.
The two members of a Gotra may have closely related genetic relationship.
They are considered Siblings, ie, brothers and sisters.
(Is devotee girls skipping marriage fearing for sexual harassment right? READ HERE!)
If they marry, because of close genetic connections, there will be issues in the health of their children also.
However, in Tamilnadu, a boy is allowed to marry the daughter of his sister. It may look like incest, but the sister is given in marriage to a boy of another Gotra and hence she has changed her Gotra. So, she and her brother are not of same gotra after her marriage. So, her daughter can marry the brother of her mother.
The Gotra indicates how close a boy and girl genetically is. Nothing else.
As per the medical science, the boy and girl will produce good children if they are genetically as distant as possible.
The chance of getting children with defects is slightly more, ie, 3% more if a boy and girl who are genetically very closer marry.
In some inevitable situations, marriage between the relatives happen. It will reduce the effects of doshas in the horoscopes of boys and girls. So, may astrologers recommend marriage among relatives if they have severe doshas.
Centuries ago, the marriages were done among the relatives only. In Tamilnadu rural families, only if the uncle (mother’s brother) of a girl allows any boy to marry her, one can marry that girl. Because in most of the families, the girls were given in marriage to the brothers of their mothers as the first priority. It is the right for that uncle to claim the daughter of his sister.
(Taking initiation (diksha) before or after marriage – Which is good? READ HERE!)
This Gotra issue arise in the marriages between a girl and boy from other families. In those days, it was easier to find out how close the boy and girl genetically were because the population was less.
Nowadays, the population has multiplied many times. The mobility of the people have increased. A remarkable percentage of boys and girls settle in a different city or country after getting job or married.
Moreover, Most of the present day boys and girls do not see any custom to get married. A girl and boy meet in the college or office. They decide to marry without bothering about community, gotra, etc.
Their calculations and priorities are different. So, sometimes, two persons of same Gotra happen to marry. Nobody knows that they belong to the same Gotra.
The role of the parents is also limited in many marriages in which the boys and girls themselves are decision making authorities.
Your father and mother too might have married without knowing that they belong to the same Gotra. Or, they might be related to each other and married knowing that their Gotra are the same.
Now, let me tell about your status:
You are innocent. You are nothing to do in the marriage of your parents.
Reciting vedic mantras in death rituals, annual rituals, temples, etc should be done only by married grahasthas. The wife should stand beside the husband while performing the rituals.
This is only for Vedic rituals. As far as devotional practices and spiritual practices are concerned, there are no conditions for Chanting, Following Ekadasi fasts, Worshiping the Lord, Honouring Prasadam, etc.
You are free to perform them. Even a Milecha, the lowest of mankind can chant and follow Krishna Consciousness.
(Is devotees dreaming about love & marriage not good? READ HERE!)
You are free to follow chanting and all other sadhanas of Krishna Consciousness and also to marry a boy and lead a normal life.
If you have some guilt, wipe them off by Chanting vigorously and become a great Vaishnavi. When you become a great Vaishnavi, all your material status will go. You will be a Vaishnavi who is close to Krishna. That’s all.
Krishna says that He will deliver us if we abandon all the varieties of material status, religious practices, etc and surrender to Him, He will deliver us.
Krishna says in Bhagavad Gita 18-66:
sarva-dharmān parityajya mām ekaṁ śaraṇaṁ vraja
ahaṁ tvāṁ sarva-pāpebhyo mokṣayiṣyāmi mā śucaḥ
Meaning:
“Abandon all varieties of religion and just surrender unto Me. I shall deliver you from all sinful reactions. Do not fear.”.
Thus, whatever be your material status, Krishna will deliver you. This is the guarantee given by Krishna.
Then why do you worry?
Just surrender to Krishna and get relieved from all your reactions.
(Marriage Only for progeny, No Contraceptive & abortion -Why should one marry? READ HERE!)